


I Dos and I Don'ts

by Thatonegothynerd



Series: Adventures of The Scarred [15]
Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-01 10:28:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18798520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thatonegothynerd/pseuds/Thatonegothynerd
Summary: Avarice dreams of wedding bells, but life isn't ever really that simple, is it?





	I Dos and I Don'ts

Every little girl dreams of her wedding day. Gods knows how many hours Avarice had spent dreaming up the perfect day. She dreamed of a beautiful white dress with lace trim and silken fabric tied up with bows and dotted with pearls. She dreamed of hundreds of roses, lilies, and lilacs lining the isles as she elegantly marched down to meet her prince charming, smiling at her all the way. She dreamed of her father on her arm as he gave her away with tears in his eyes, so happy for his darling little girl. And now, watching Millicent getting down on one knee to ask Kel the one question she had desperately wanted to hear for the person she loved, those dreams Avarice had began to shatter before her eyes. 

Millicent and Kel were going to be married. They were going to live their own little slice of happily ever after. Avarice was happy for her friends, she truly was. They both deserved it, some happiness, after all they had been through, but that didn’t stop a stab of ugly jealousy from shooting through her heart. She was the one consumed by the idea of happy endings that Kel seemed to think didn’t exist. She wanted this - she had always wanted this - but Kel had never dreamed of it before Millicent. 

She was scared to look at Dragomir. She has no clue what she would find in his face, but she was terrified of what he might see in hers: just how badly she wanted this. She wanted her own fairy tale moment where she could say “yes” and “I do.” She was so terrified that her want for this would scare him off, or make him back away from her even more than he already had. 

That night, as Avarice lay as she always did, wrapped in the warm and comforting embrace of Dragomir’s arms, she thought of what that future she so desperately wanted would look like. She knew that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him, she had known that for quite some time, but just how much time would that be? What they both did was dangerous. She was a spy for an underground, highly illegal organization that had no problem turning its back on its own members.How many Clasp members had she seen dead? How many did she have a hand in killing? And Dragomir, he hunted monsters. That was just about as dangerous as a job could get. How many years did a person live doing a job like that? If Dragomir was to be believed, not many. She hadn’t met many blood hunters, but all of the ones she had were relatively young and there was a reason for that. And not only that, but there was the issue of age to consider. Supposing that both of them got to live the fullest extent of their lives, there was a gap in how many years that was. If Avarice was lucky and she lived the longest and most full life she could, she might get 120 years in total. Dragomir on the other hand, he could live centuries possibly with all of the mutations he had subjected himself to over the years. What would happen to them in 20 years? In 40? What about when she was an old woman and he still looked like he was in his 30s? He wouldn’t want to be with her then. She wouldn’t blame him for not wanting to be with her then. 

That old thought returned before she shut her eyes, the thought created when she felt so desperately alone and thought she’d never see him again: he probably doesn’t imagine a future with her. Why should he? There was no future for the two of them, as she had just confirmed to herself over and over again. She loved him, she truly did, and he said he loved her too, nut there was always the thought in the back of her mind that he was just saying what she wanted to hear. She hated herself for thinking like that, there was no reason not to trust Dragomir and he was a terrible liar, but years with Vasily, whispering sweet nothings to her and then stabbing her in the back made her incapable of taking anyone’s words at face value. Years of being told “I love you” as a lie had tainted the words ever so slightly so that maybe it was impossible for her to ever really trust those words again. Maybe that’s why she longed for something more. Maybe that’s why, to her, I love you seemed like it might not be enough. She drifted off to sleep on that thought, uncertain of her future with her love, but knowing she loved him all the same. 

The next morning, she woke up once again in Dragomir’s arms. She was still amazed at how lucky she was to wake up next to him in the morning. She moved away from him ever so slightly to take him in fully. His white hair was unbound, the now singular, defiant streak of brown hair resting carelessly across his cheek. His muscular arms, deadly in battle, were so gentle as the held her close. The scar across his left eye was still present, along with the myriad of smaller faded scars on his face and body, but his face as he slept was free of all of the pain he had been caused over the years. The lines of stress and fierceness were gone, the black veins that appeared after he drank his mutagens were nowhere in sight. His expression was totally relaxed. Like this, she could almost picture him before tragedy entered his life. She could see him, head full of brown hair and an unworried smile on his beardless face back in Wildemount. This was the Dragomir that only Avarice got to see. This Dragomir was sweet and kind and cared so much. This Dragomir loved her with all of his heart. 

As if he could read her mind, Dragomir opened his crimson eyes that she loved so much and gave her a smile. She knew there was an answering one on her face. He seemed to be taking in her face the same way she had just taken in his. 

“Good morning,” he said after a stretch of comfortable silence. 

“Good morning,” she replied. 

After a moment, his face shifted. His smile fell and his expression was suddenly serious. 

“Hey, can we talk?” 

No. No no no nonononno. He was going to leave her. That was the only reason he would want to “talk.” Oh gods. What had she done? She thought things had been going so well recently. Her fears from last night came rushing back. He finally realized they had no future and was going to end it. This was is. 

“Yes,” she said, barely audible, trying her best to keep her panic off of her face and out of her voice.

Dragomir took a moment to try and read her face, carefully considering his words.

“I know the last few weeks have been… difficult, and I just want to know if you’re okay.” 

What? So this wasn’t him leaving? 

“The last few weeks have been strange to say the least,” she said, crafting her sentences with equal measure to him,” but I honestly think that, right now, I’m doing… okay.” 

It was the truth. The last few weeks, and the last one in particular, had been some of the strangest she’d ever experienced, but it had also been good for her in so many ways. They had gotten rid of their biggest threat, Elisande would never bother them again. No more assassination attempts or fear of magic wielding, power hungry psycho trying to kill them. They had been named heroes. Their song had flooded the streets and the people praised them for their deeds, so different from the condemnation she had known in life. And she had a mother. A real honest to gods mother. She wasn’t evil, well, at least not entirely, and she loved Avarice, and beyond all reason Avarice loved her too. There had been hardships to be sure, but overall? Life was good for her right now beyond the fear that always lingered in the back of her mind. 

“After what happened with Kel and Millicent the other day,” he said, still trying to gauge her thoughts, “I’ve been thinking about the future.”

Panic rose in Avarice again.

“I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Avarice.”

Avarice searched for any hint of falseness in his voice, but found none. 

“I love you, but I don’t know what the future holds for us,” he said, now looking away. “What I do is dangerous, and I can’t promise I’ll come home every time. And there’s also age. You could take the mutagens too, eventually if you want to, but I’m not going to lie it’s not a pretty or a fun process.” It was like he was reading her mind. Every fear she’d had last night, reflected in his voice. He was just as scared as she was, and that thought was so relieving to her. 

“I don’t know if I’ll want to,” she said and he nodded in response. The thought of living beyond her allotted years was somehow just as terrifying as only living the ones she had. “I’m scared for the future too. It’s terrifying. But I just want to be here with you, now. We really only have today.”

“I just,” he said, still looking away in thought, “I want us to be able to talk more.” He looked at her. “I want us to talk. I want to be here for you.”

“I want that too,” she said. That was all she had ever wanted. “I love you, Dragomir.”

“I love you, Princess,” he said and gently kissed her. 

They lay there together in silence for a moment. This conversation was so long needed, both were relieved to finally have a moment a perfect understanding, and Avarice was, above all, so glad to finally have a moment where she didn’t feel the need to lie. She could be herself with Dragomir, all of her fear and insecurity could show themselves, and he would be there. He wouldn’t run away. Her brave and kind knight in shining armor would always be there, right at her side. 


End file.
